Lenerd Louw being interviewed by the World’s Mayor, Joshua T Bergman
Why are men’s circles important?
Why are we not being taught how to make love?
How do men become multi orgasmic?
Why is this so important?
How damaging is porn to a healthy sex life, or is it?
Why is it so important to last longer in bed?
What to do if you or your partner do not want to have sex?
If you gay, bisexual or fluid are you welcome and safe on Lenerd’s men courses?
And in these cases what general advice can you give regarding what to do or ask before joining a men’s or woman’s group?
Transcript
I love what you’re about I love what you
represent because in my eyes the truth
and the message that you deliver brings
healing and and it and you create a safe
place for men to talk about sex and
sexuality not in a locker room perverted
sense but in a very healthy mature way
I’m super passionate about that you know
for me to sit in a circle or sit in you
know video Zoom call
Circle and be able to express what they
you know feel deep inside and share
ideas and share experiences and share
their
vulnerability uh there aren’t many
spaces for that and I find that is just
super amazing the moment you create that
space and I do that with that 21 day
journey of mine one is actually starting
now 8 November very soon and uh yeah so
we have four Zoom calls and then we sit
and the guys sit and we uh you know like
go through the discussions and it’s
amazing the learnings you know that
comes out of that um because you know
it’s there’s so much fear guilt and
shame around sexuality and at the moment
you start talking about it and sharing
then all of the stuff come up um yeah
and there’s so much about love making
and and sex that we don’t know about
that no one has ever taught us about you
know um why is
you know you learn algebra at school and
you know you learn how to play rugby or
soccer and basketball and you know so
but no one ever tght teaches you about
love making which is I find super
fascinating and when you start talking
about putting stuff together and say how
can I get men to uh drop deeper into
their their love making potential and
people are like wow that’s interesting
you know why would you need learning
about that but but but but you do like
with any any skill like with any you
know art you know you need a bit of
practice and you need to to learn a few
basic things and I think the reason to
answer your question I think there’s so
much guilt shame and fear around
sexuality that has been totally
suppressed and that hasn’t come out
really um it’s not it wasn’t comfortable
for people to talk about it but I think
that’s changing luckily
now how how do men become multi
orgasmic yes you know so so we always
hear the thing that but women are
multi-orgasmic and then as men aren’t
and and it’s it’s
absolutely uh not true uh so men can
become multi-orgasmic by learning to to
breathe energy up in their bodies so
when you get to full arousal and energy
buol in your growing area then often
what happens is it you know it it SPS
out there but if you learn how to
breathe the energy up how to expand the
energy in your body and you learn what
call ejaculation Choice ejaculation
control seen
retention then you start feeling a lot
of experiences through your body a lot
of Sensations through your body and you
start having these other can call it
orgasms or you can call other Sensations
through your body which is not just the
ejaculatory orgasm and that be become
like women you become like feel all the
sensations you become multi-orgasmic you
could also have with your genitals this
this experience of ejaculating but
without the SE semen coming out so you
can have this orgasm without ejaculation
and
then 2 minutes later can have another
orgasm without ejaculation now if you
ejaculate it you would go soft
immediately you would lose your
erection and it will take you a little
bit of time time to get that direction
back what they call the refractory
period you know whe it’s depending on
your age whether it’s you know half an
hour or an hour or a day um but if you
don’t ejaculate then you contain that
energy within your body and you can have
this multiple orgasms which is often you
know what women women go through um so
I’m super passionate about this Joshua
to get that out there and I mean it’s
just this is we just touching on one
area of sucess ity and of Love Making
now but this is so important for me
because very few people know about it um
and the one big thing that this does is
it extends the period that you make love
and the reason that is so important is
that as a man you AR within you know 2
three minutes and get an erection but
for example you know let’s talk about
women now it takes them 15 20 minutes
just to heat up you know and for them to
get into their gasmic St St so therefore
it’s quite important for a guy to last
longer it’s not about pressing different
buttons and what of the different spots
in G Spot and you it’s not a technical
thing just if you can be there and you
can make love for a longer then your
partner goes into a orgasmic State and
can CH enough orgasms and and it’s not
just about the love making that is that
is then so much more enjoyable it’s also
a deep connection that happens because
now it’s not just a 2 three minute
encounter where you look in one corner
of the room and see other and it’s 2
minutes you know as opposed to when you
have make laugh for 20 minutes or an
hour and you have eye contact you know
can just imagine where that takes the
relationship so it’s a deep heart
connection that happens
also how damaging is porn
to a healthy sex life or is it I think
it’s very damaging I really do believe
that
um um you know the thing with
porn is that it takes you out of your
body into your
mind
yeah exactly you’re going to this whole
mind space you know with porn and then
you when you’re with your woman or your
man later on you’re actually not with
them in the experience you are now in
the movie in your head so now instead of
feeling each other’s bodies and
connecting with each other’s bodies
you’re actually playing a movie in your
head of what the porn do that you
watched so it takes you out of the the
the experience that you’re in and out of
the body experience um and it also is
really really damaging as far as
ejaculation is concerned because most of
the know the the porn movies is about
the what they call the money shot you
know the C shot you know the ejaculation
shot you know and it encourages guys to
to come fast so now you watch porn you
masturbate
self-pleasure uh and you come in within
two minutes and then you do that every
day now you’re with a real life woman
with flesh not the screen
woman you’re going to come in two
minutes why would it be different you
know and that’s where the premature
ejaculation or coming too early come
from it’s you know porn is teaching you
to run sprints and then when you’re with
a woman you are more running marathons
you know so now Sprinter goes to this
engagement with a woman in a marathon
engagement but he Sprints and two
minutes later he’s finished and the
woman is waiting for the marison
Renner that makes so much
sense I didn’t even I’ve NE okay I’ve
heard all of the the
spiritual I’ve heard all of the
psychological I’ve heard all of these
explanations but you were the first
person I’ve ever heard explain it that
way it makes so much sense
what do you say for
people that that are in a relationship
and they’ve kind of now they’re starting
to go through in a bit of an Awakening
for themselves and they start to realize
that they’re not really the same they’re
not really
compatible
and it sexually physically or even what
their desires are but yet they’ve got
children they’re in a committed Rel
they’re they were in a committed
relationship
but now they’ve realized that they just
want something different sexually but
everything else works for them what
would you advise a couple uh that that’s
in a situation like
that wow that’s a really tough one
um okay let me answer it directly not
trying to be politically correct or
anything like that you know but my view
is that for a relationship you have to
have love and sex for a relationship to
last uh you have have to have love sex
and if you could put a romance in even
better um and that you can’t have
relationship long term just with sex
without love and vice versa the bottom
line for me is actually to to to
suppress your sexuality in the space um
especially if the one partner doesn’t if
both Partners doesn’t want it I suppose
that’s fine then it it continues I think
it’s still sad because I think having
sex and love in a relationship is
amazing but I think when there’s this
disconnect as I understand you correctly
Joshua where the one wants and other one
what doesn’t then I think it’s kind of
the end of the relationship you know and
I mean that’s just my personal space on
it unless you can find where you can
bolt that desire so I don’t think you
just call it quits immediately you can
actually go and do some stuff and that
person that doesn’t feel a sexual desire
can do you know there are workshops
there’s a lot of stuff that one can do
and see whether depending how much they
love each other but they want to make it
work and if they can do that then great
but let’s say the bond person is like
NOP I’m not into this I’m finish sex in
my life um then I honestly my view is if
you suppress this
sexuality you you’re denying experience
of your life you know are you going to
live then for the next 20 years without
that sexual expression
um you no you can separate and still
have the kids and everything and and
still have a
beautiful relation relationship not
necessarily romantic and sexual but go
your way you know and have separate
relationships um so my my my my state
space is that you know we on this planet
to with bodies we here to experience
life and sexuality is a big part of it
so my advice would be not to not to walk
away from that but to to experience that
or to to lose that gift especially if
you feel it bubbling up in your system
and you feel wow I want to express this
then to suppress that would be very sad
well because it doesn’t go away it
doesn’t go away that is% right
you all you want but that shit’s not
going away exactly you’re right brother
and it’s just going to pop up in
unhealthy ways or different ways
eventually you’re going to cheat at your
partner or other stuff is going to
happen you know so 100% you know it’s
just you’re not going to you can’t wish
it away and and why would you you know I
for 30 something year uh not 30 yeah 30
about 30 years I prayed my sexual tried
to pray my sexuality
away it didn’t go it just got worse like
it became it got unhealthy because I was
trying to run from it trying to suppress
it every time I had a desire I would
shame the [ __ ] out of myself and I’m so
fortunate that I have a partner and
Jessica that I can be brutally I can
just be honest like I can just be myself
and there’s no issue it is so
comfortable and so safe for me that
everyone out there that is cheating that
is sneaking around that’s doing all
those things I’m telling you there’s a
better way for you you just got to be
honest I mean if you’re currently
cheating on your wife or your partner
and I mean that may cause some
complications when you tell the truth
but I’m telling you they’re gonna find
out the truth eventually anyway sure you
might as well just tell the truth
because if that is really who you are
and it’s really what you want honesty
will bring you what you want truth in
the same way truth will attract your
tribe the only way to really get what we
want is to be honest about what we want
I love that Joshua I love that man I
love that example of yours no so do you
want to stay wanted to stay in like the
space where you’re not honest and then
you don’t have this experience or do you
want to move into the space of where you
are honest and what you have with
Jessica now which is you can be your
totally yourself so that kind of then
means for the previous question that you
asked is that in some cases that means
it’s the end of the relationship and
that’s okay you know you can go separate
still in life it doesn’t have to be this
disaster fight nightmare situation um if
you can’t be yourself in a relationship
why be in it you know 100% and another
thing too here’s my experience and I’m
not and I’m not trying to stereotype
women here at all at all but I’ve
believe this and I could be wrong but if
you’re feeding a woman’s love language
if you’re giving her love and you’re
giving her the things that she
needs you would be surprised what they
would women would say yes to like you
would be surprised that they want to
become that fantasy woman for you or
they’ll they’ll Ro play or they’ll play
they’ll do the things that you want you
want a finger in your butt okay you
could be honest about it but if you’re
feeding her love language and she feels
loved and she feels
safe
yep you got your ride or die right there
because I don’t believe women are as
complicated as men make them out to be
at all I mean they have basic needs that
we need to
pH totally agree I think we’re much more
similar than than than different I
really believe that and being honest and
being open and you know women love that
if you’re just open with them what what
you want and you’re honest it’s amazing
what you know but you you’re direct and
you’re open with it you don’t try to get
to do it in other ways just be open and
direct but also I love what you’re
saying about love you know this if they
can see it comes from an open heart and
from love uh tell you your woman is open
to to almost everything you have you’ve
you’ve started something new right don’t
you have something you’re about to
launch yes yes uh I’ve got a 21-day uh
uh online course call it sexual Mastery
or gmic Mastery 21 day and it’s going
out now on 8 8 November and oh Joshua
it’s I’ve done it two times before so
this is the third round um and it’s a
guided Journey you know so we there 20
guys so and it’s not too big a group
there only 20 guys or so 20 30 Max and
uh it’s 21 days of no ejaculation no
watching porn for 21 days you get videos
on a daily basis um and we have our Zoom
calls four Zoom calls the one Zoom call
before day one and day 714 and 21 then
we as group of men come together and you
know it’s share in those in those in
those circles how it’s going with the
course what’s the difficulties and and
the guys learn from each other so it’s a
beautiful sharing on that basis and
there’s a few agreements on that place
like as I say the the no ejaculation the
no watching porn some breathing uh stuff
you do in the morning you know you do it
independently but it’s you you agree you
agree to these agreements 2 three four
agreements um and yeah now the the
testimonials that I’ve had out that is
amazing the C are blown away you know so
much more than sexual Mastery and and
becoming multi-orgasmic it’s that also
but it’s also led to people and their
heart connections with their Partners
going to another level it’s led to men
you know selflove you know it’s learn
you know you get to learn how to
self-pleasure masturbate you know uh
differently it it’s basically just
talking talking through it you don’t
never have to get naked or just to be
clear on that or or self P Zoom call or
anything like that
I so don’t worry none of that no circle
jerk on Zoom is what you’re
saying question I had this question
other day and I thought [ __ ] I must just
make that clear so it’s not but I’m very
clear about wow most men know don’t know
that you can actually self pleasure by
touching your arm and your face and you
don’t have to go to the genitals
immediately so for example that is in um
but there’s also a lot about the why the
purp and what you want to get out of it
um it’s also about sexual energy
Transportation how you can use this
energy that I’m now building up and use
it for areas in your life for business
for projects you know the Think and Grow
Rich book of Napoleon Hill you was right
to about sexual energy transportation we
also look at that so so it’s quite
wide what I want okay I’m going to ask
you something and I I’m only asking from
my perspective because I used to be in
this situation
and I feel that I should ask because
well this
is because I I I I I get
messages from people privately so I know
that this is an issue a lot of men
especially men that are more fluid
sexually and like or they’re bisexual or
whatever it may be they’re still
masculine they’re they’re masculine but
they’re by and they they enjoy men and
women both but when it comes to
when you’re for me being and I I
consider more fluid than the actual lab
label of bisexual but in my experience
when it comes to male bonding it’s
always very
uncomfortable because of my own
insecurities around well if they know
that I’m fluid sexually or I could be
attracted to one of them they may treat
me differently and not welcome me and
not be part of the tribe because you’re
homo or your you know because of the
stereotypes that gay men have by men
have what what in an environment like
this it’s a male group we’re looking for
male bonding and it’s not sexual but
it’s about something sexual and sexual
transmutation so I’m going into this
environment as somebody that’s fluid
sexually that I could be attracted to
someone in the group but I’m not going
there to hook up I’m going there to get
well sexually what does someone like
what can you say to somebody that’s
interested in being a part of a group
like this or any other men’s a treat
alpha male group whatever it may be that
may be sexually fluid or bisexual or to
the straight person that may judge
somebody that is bisexual coming into
the group what do I I know I just
butcher that question but I think you
know what I’m trying to say
what kind of advice do you have for
someone that is not the straight alpha
male that’s wanting to go be a part of
an alpha male
group that is so important so in my
groups I’ve had bisexual fluid gay guys
also in the group you know and I
sometimes use the heteronormative
language about male and women and woman
body different but I often talk about ma
male and male and I just thought my I’m
very open and I say guys I’m not
experienced that I’m I’m quite
heterosexual but I am I believe and by
and obviously bisexual men this is huge
huge importance for that you know that’s
the beauty if you put a lot of men
around a circle and it’s just men and
it’s you create a safe space for for
sharing and vulnerability you’ll be
astonished about the open the guys are
so the straight heterosexual guys are
super accepting you know
yeah so it it’s fascinating so I almost
just want to put that message out not to
be scared to come to a Ben circle like
that if you’re bisexual or if you full
on gay you know and and not even wi it
doesn’t matter it’s about sexual Mastery
sexual Mastery is not just making love
you know to man women it could be women
women it could be you know so and the
stuff we’re talking about in terms of
you know ejaculation Choice applies as
much as making love to a man as to a
woman you know so so I want to just put
it out there that you know and I
understand that that there sometimes it
could be a bit of a fear and a bit of
uncomfortable is oh wow I might get a B
detached there but in these circles and
my circles definitely not everything’s
welcome and everyone is welcome and
whatever other stuff I I want to talk
about I always say everything is welcome
any energy never mind the sexual
orientation anything else is welcome you
know this is not just about pure
beautiful roses and love you know we we
guys can share anything they want today
and I know it’s getting better but
there’s so many people that live in fear
of being honest because of these men’s
only groups or women’s only groups and
if they’re a little bit different it’s
hard to know how do I fit in so a lot of
people are not willing to go be a part
of these groups even though it would be
a huge blessing for them because of fear
so I’m grateful that you answer that
space but not everybody is like you man
like you have you’re a special unique in
individual you really are Leonard I I
I’m I’m that this is why you’re back
like I’m a fan of you but not everyone
has your attitude so if
someone is looking for a group and maybe
they don’t know about you and of course
they will because of this interview but
in other other interviews you’ve done
but say somebody that doesn’t know who
you are and doesn’t know that that your
group is safe for them what are some
questions that a man or woman could ask
before joining a group like that that
would help them feel safe those things
you mentioned you know who’s welcome
here what are your views on on on on
that what type of circle is it uh
straight off I’m I’m bisexual would
would that be a problem in your circle
or am I going to get judgments I’ll I’ll
be just very direct about it um uh yeah
it’s crazy man is crazy this world we
live in I must I must tell you though
maybe because I I suppose a lot of it
what i is in a spiritual circles and a
tantra cires and and a I I tell you I
find very little of that honestly I felt
total
openness uh on on any not just sexual
orientation but but gender flu flu
fluidity uh it’s amazing I mean these
groups and I find very little Prejudice
in in the spaces that I encounter but I
do get it that traditionally speaking
yes some maybe conservative groups or
Bible groups you might have that but I
would just address it directly I would
say listen he man I’m I’m a gay guy can
I what how is your circle is it with
that I’m going to get judged there or is
it something that it’s uh that includes
it and and does your work also include
gay people and do you also talk about
that can you also to add value to that I
think asking the direct questions is
super important oh I I I that’s that’s
the perfect advice I think and you know
in America is a little bit different
we’re not as mature about sexuality yet
in fact I think that gone the opposite
direction of maturity um but I I love
that answer because that answer being
honest
is the universal answer for everything
if you ask me um I I really do
appreciate that answer I it’s because
again there’s a lot of people out there
that are just feel so alone and they’re
not they don’t and they don’t have to be
and you know and it’s there’s
more I don’t know I I I’m excited that
things are starting to change and like
in some respect the pendulum has swung
so far the other way that it looks like
it’s never coming back like there’s a
level of
insanity that has gone on with some of
the sexual identity stuff and and the
way that it’s heavily marketed and
forced in people’s faces in America but
that said I do think it’s getting better
and um but it all comes down to truth so
I just I really love that Leonard I um I
I always love talking to you I love your
Insight I love your wisdom I would love
it if you could you know take the last
final moments plug your new the new
course uh plug your website plug your
social media plug anything you want to
promote and any last words you want to
share the floor is
yours oh thanks thanks brother yeah I
think the maybe to share the link of the
of the course starting soon uh it’s it’s
open right now and the first Zoom call
is in 8 November so that’s the one thing
I’m quite passionate about it what’s the
website name uh so this Lenard low.com
oh okay your personal website my
personal website yeah and under the
online courses is the the courses lying
there but I think if we could put maybe
the link straight in the
description yeah so I would love to have
more guys and especially American guys
on my on my on my International it’s
from Hong Kong to Europe to wherever I
had a few California guys last W to have
more yeah I’d love to have more and uh
and uh yeah so that’s the one course
that I really feel passionate about and
it’s guided it’s self study there but I
guided is so much more powerful so I’m
looking forward to put a nice group of
guys together I was in festivals in
Europe now presenting in uh in
Switzerland Poland Amsterdam and turkey
and um a few guys that were on the uh in
the Geneva part of of of it already
signed up you know so so we got a nice
International crowd French Swiss guys
that’s on on on going to be on the
journey with us so cool yeah yeah it’s
super cool and it’s not even going to be
an International Circle jerk on Zoom
it’s going to be an
actual exactly sorry that shows my
maturity sometimes oh that’s beautiful
life is life life is is fun man I I’m
such a fan Leonard I I’m grateful for
the work you do because it it creates a
safe place for people like me to I mean
I’m pretty comfortable being honest
about where I’m at but not everybody is
and I but I know that if you can make
someone like like me feels safe that you
can do it for others and and I don’t
trust many people especially in regards
to this subject um but you to me are one
of the good ones you have an amazing
story which if you ladies and gentlemen
if you can watch the last interview I
did with Leonard uh we get into his
story he knows what he’s talking about
he’s been there there’s no judgment it’s
a safe place and he knows what he’s
talking about and you can learn a lot
from him so I highly recommend you all
check out his course on his personal
website which you’ll be able to find the
link below and Leonard thank you thank
you thank you for your time man oh
awesome Josh thank you brother it’s
always so much fun talking to you and uh
yeah wonderful thanks thanks AOL and
thanks for the beautiful work you you’re
doing in these podcasts it’s it’s so
cool well I appreciate you sir thank you
very much good luck on your course
thanks BR bye
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